Yearning For Respite

I sit here after eight long years,
I sit here breathing, but barely,
I sit here, a soul asking for relief,
I sit here, my eyes red with tears.

I stare at the telephone all day long,
I stare at it through the dark nights,
I wish, I pray, I hope to hear it ring,
And upon answering hear your voice.

It has been three years since I last saw your face,
Three dreadful years since I last heard your voice,
Three painful years since I last breathed at peace,
Three terrible years since I woke up with a purpose.

Every day since the last day I saw you,
Has been more painful since the last,
The only obsession that keeps me alive,
Is the hope of hearing the telephone ring.

I love you more than anything in this world,
You never knew how profoundly I fell for you,
The wound which would only deepen and hurt,
Has caused the beating of my heart to fade away.

I just wish to see you again,
Before I lose my weary mind,
I just hope to hold you close,
At least once in this wretched life.

I love you so much it can’t be expressed,
Words never failed me before I saw you,
It felt like god put an angel on this Earth,
For me to keep warm in the merciless cold.

It has been eight lengthy painful years,
How long before god shows me mercy?
When will I hear that telephone ring?
You will call, I know you will! Won’t you?

Angel Of Life

I walk these blackened streets,
I walk through the dark alleys,
The sun had failed me today,
To remove the darkness today.

Everywhere I would turn my heavy head,
There was no light, just empty darkness,
I’d walk endlessly in search of the light,
Not the lies hidden within the half-lights.

I searched for the light in the thickest shadows,
Which would expel the darkness for eternities,
I needed the light to rekindle my fading soul,
For every passing moment expelled my hope.

As I stood there, my heart’s beating subsiding,
The darkness crept upon my weakened soul,
It stepped forth to claim another for itself,
As I nearly gave into the creeping darkness.

I raised my eyes and saw a brilliant light,
The white light of purity tore the shadows,
The white light did bear a beautiful face,
With lips I yet long to touch with my own.

I held her hand as she guided me through the gloom,
Her fingers tightly locked in my fingers throughout,
I never wished the grip to loosen, this moment to end,
you subdued the darkness and you did save my very being.

The Last Time

The last time I looked into your eyes,
Was the last time I felt my soul relax,
The last time I held your hand in mine,
Was the last time my heart skipped a beat.

I miss the moments we shared,
The times we would sit together,
Talk about everything there was,
And stay silent for endless hours.

The last time your lips touched mine,
Was the last time I felt my head spin,
The last time you slept on my chest,
Was the last time I felt my heart beat.

I miss the sound of your sweet laughter,
Which plucked the strings of my heart,
The sweetest melody paled in comparison,
I knew nothing as enchanting as your voice.

The last time I felt your soft skin against mine,
Was the last time I was truly thankful to be alive,
The last time I felt true happiness from my heart,
Was the moment before your eyes lost their color.

I look upon you today from a distance,
With a crying heart and a weeping soul,
As you lay in that brown wooden casket,
Your new home, under six feet of earth.

Painful Bond

I'd feel so happy when we sit together,
No contact, no words spoken, not one,
You'd sit there oblivious to the world,
Lost deeply in your own thoughts.

I sit here oblivious to the world,
Lost deeply in your angelic eyes,
Lost with your intoxicating aroma,
Found once you would say a word.

"You are the best person I know,
Thank you for being a true friend."
These words always made me cold,
You loved me, but not the way I did.

I wished to say the words my heart bade me say,
But the fear of your disdain muffled them yet again,
I wish I had the courage to tell you how I felt,
I wish you had the ears to hear the words of my heart.

You stole my heart as you came,
And you stayed closest to me,
You loved me as a sister would,
But I loved you as a lover would.

Words I left unspoken mutilated my heart,
But I have not the courage to tell you,
"My love! See me as one who loves you,
or don't see me at all, sever the bond"

I have not the courage to tell you this,
But my heart wishes to be heard today,
We love each other dearly that is true,
But you don't love me, the way I love you.

Lackluster

Never in my life had this ever happened,
Every second with you brought serenity,
Every second away from you was torment,
Reality seemed sweeter with your embrace,
And your absence did terribly vex my soul,
Vex me with the most hideous nightmares.

Lord wished to test my strength and reserve,
Only to which he knew the vile reason,
Vines of death did creep upon you, slowly,
Every second they crept closer to your soul,
Stabbed I was! Deeper in my heart, as they crept.

Soon after they found your soul,
Hades rose and did claim you,
In an instance your light was gone,
My purpose, lost, I felt so very useless,
Utterly useless as I lay lost in the corner,
Lost in the darkness without your luster.

Waiting For Forever

Today is the biggest day in my life,
I promised I'd meet you today,
Its been eight years since the day,
Since the day we found each other.

Today I will unify us forever,
I just can't wait any longer,
I will unify you and me,
In the holiest matrimony.

As I look at the ring,
The ring of engagement,
My heart sings with joy,
anticipating our union.

I place the ring in my pocket,
And walk out of my home,
And journey towards yours,
Yearning for your embrace.

I knocked upon your door,
There was no answer,
I threw rocks at your window,
Still I was left unanswered.

I would sit by the front door,
Await you to return to me,
Return from your journey,
One you took without me.

As I'd wait upon your doormat,
I'd look at two women talking,
Talking with a voice of sorrow,
And with eyes in pain for me.

As they'd whisper, they didn't know,
That every word was crystal clear,
"look, a true lover sits yonder,
She died years ago, yet he waits."